Choices

I read Jeremiah 26:14 tonight and I asked myself at what point does submission lead to passive apathy. Skipping a lot of what I wrote, this is what I ended with. I know I haven't posted for a while, but this seemed worth posting.

It's better to choose not to choose than to just not choose at all. It's better to submit or surrender your choice than to deny or ignore the fact that you have one. Basically, the outward actions of submission and apathy look very much the same. It's the hidden attitudes behind those actions that are different. Like in most situations, forgetting the attitudes behind actions can lead to false assumptions about the meaning of those actions. Watch your choices and be careful not to judge others for their choices too quickly.

Questions? Am I making any sense? I could write more.

I should be working on an essay

If slavery is not having control over your own life, then freedom is having control over your own life. Ultimate freedom would therefore be to have control over what you ultimately give your life to. Living freely is living in the knowledge that your life is and will be given to what you choose no matter when or how it ends.

I live freely now because of the knowledge that my life will ultimately be given to an eternity with God no matter when or how I die.





John 15:13

2 Timothy 2:13

You know what I love? You know why I can get up every morning? You know why I can make time to journal every night? It's verses like 2 Timothy 2:13:

"If we are faithless, He remains faithful ---
for He cannot deny himself."


God cannot not be God. I can falter and fail and fumble and fall, yet God will still be faithful. I don't deserve that. No one does.

Companion

I haven't posted for a while and I should have. A few weeks back, I wrote an article for the school paper and then last week it was published in the WeatherVane. I meant to post it, but in the busyness of college life I never remembered to. Today I was told that the word "companion" literally involves people who share bread together. It's people with bread. That reminded me to post my article. So, now I have!

An Invitation to Remember Jesus’ Humanity, Communion

By Daniel Miller, Contributing writer

“And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, ‘This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me’” (Luke 22:19). How common is bread? It was a staple of the rich and the poor. It composed the simplest meal and complemented the most bountiful feast. Those who had it lived; those that lacked it starved. As Jesus spoke these words at the Last Supper, God dared to transform the most commonplace food into a symbol of divinity in human flesh. Jesus’ parting gift was a tool for the disciples gathered around him to come together, share in a meal, and know that he is always present. God invited everyone to remember all of Jesus’ life in the simple, daily, mandatory act of consuming bread.

A few days later, two men walked away from Jerusalem to a small village called Emmaus. They were discussing all the events of the past days, of Jesus’ arrest, trial, crucifixion and the latest story of his resurrection, when Jesus himself came up and walked beside them. The two did not recognize the man and proceeded to tell him all about his own life. Jesus walked along listening and teaching them the deeper meaning of the prophets’ words as they recalled all he had done and all he had said. When they reached their destination the two men invited Jesus to share in a meal with them. “When he was at the table with them, he took bread, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them” (Luke 24:30). At this, the two men recognized him and he disappeared.

It was as if the memory was enough. The men knew plenty about Jesus—his life, teachings, death—but when walking with him at their side for miles they could not remember him. It was as if they forgot that Jesus was one to walk and talk with his disciples. It was as if they forgot he grew tired and hungry, weary and worn. It was as if they forgot he was indeed fully human! He accepted their invitation to eat bread with them that they may accept his invitation to remember him. And once their eyes were opened and they realized what kind of God they served, he was needed no more. They knew their God dealt with people, not positions. They knew their God cared for relationships, not regulations. In walking and talking among friends, in sharing in a meal—He would always be with them.

When you sit down for a meal, when you share time with friends, stop. Stop and look around at those with you. Look at them and see who they are—not random people, but friends. They are brothers; they are sisters. They are loved by God. Remember that. Remember them. Then eat and share in the memory of the meal; partake of the fellowship that our God demonstrated for us and encouraged us to have. Remember our God that, as a human, partook in this same action with those He knew. Accept His invitation to remember.

Sunday notes

I wrote some stuff down during church at the Table today and I want to post it. I thought about fleshing out my scribbles, but I won't. I'll let you come to your own conclusions from something God talked with me about this morning. Enjoy!



Space of lament:
What do I deserve?
What do You give?
forgiveness, mercy
blessings, grace
hardships, trials
What do I deserve? -- nothing. What have I earned? -- nothing.
What do You give? -- everything, good and bad. Then You make it good.
suffering, starvation, disasters, death -- can they be good?
Can even God make them good?
Yes, but I can't believe it.
I can't see it; I can't understand it.
I must trust.

WAAG!!

WAAG!!
What An Awesome God!!


That's it. I just needed to restate this essential truth.

Prayer

So once upon a Friday afternoon, I was spurred by a friend to think about prayer. I suppose it was mostly a casual comment, but I took it and ran with it anyway! Turns out I really like doing stuff like this! I pulled out past journals and other stuff and just had fun! I guess that makes me kind of lame if this is my opinion of fun on a Friday afternoon!

So here's most of what I wrote. I realized partially through writing it that I might as well post it on my blog. Whether people read it or not it's who I am and I might as well post it. Enjoy!


Last fall dramatically changed my prayer life. I'm not sure if I should call it a good change or not. For months I refused to pray aloud at all. I just wouldn't do it, unless it was really forced on me and then I'd be bitter at whoever asked me to. But anyway, basically two phrases come to mind: "Language has limitations, prayer doesn't," and "wordless groans."

"Language has limitations, prayer doesn't," is from September 29, 2007. I was sitting up on the hill at EMU crying my heart out because I didn't know what else to do. I wanted to pray; I wanted to work through things logically in my head, but I was totally incapable of finding words to even give my thoughts meaning. I couldn't do it! I couldn't think and I thought I couldn't pray. But I could pray. I could pray by crying. I could "just come to God in prayer, lay myself at his feet, and trust in his goodness." I didn't need words then. When I journalled that night I did have words to at least write something down even if "journalling isn't always enough. Pen and paper isn't always adequate." (I feel like I could quote that entry all day! "I am not in control! Let me say that again: I am not in control!" "My job isn't to be God for the world; it's to show God to the world!" "I have to confess my shortcomings and my limitations. After that God's faithfulness takes over! His bounty and love and grace and mercy and forgiveness begin to pour out! In my weakness is God's strength. That's what I learned.")

Sorry, back to the topic at hand. That phrase traveled with me for a while. Then later in October I was going through Romans and got to 8:26 and specifically the phrase "the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans." At that point is when I stopped praying aloud. I just felt like praying was kind of pointless. What could I tell God or bring to God that He didn't already know? I felt like I was praying to prove my spirituality or win God points or something.

Through it all though, I learned to pray more. One of my favorite verses is 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17 "Rejoice always, pray continually." People tell me praying continually isn't possible, but I say it can be. I don't say that I do, but I say that I've seen enough to believe it is possible. Praying with words at specific times during the day makes prayer formal and routine, but it doesn't have to be that way. For a while I enjoyed having a seemingly endless conversation with God! It wasn't a conversation with words, but with smiles and random thoughts and pleas and groans and other people. It was amazing!

I don't know what all this means, perhaps I'd just say stop trying to pray and just be with God. If you have something to say, then say it. I don't encourage silence, it was just something I had to go through. But if you don't have anything to say then say nothing--think nothing. Be with God. He knows all of our thoughts and prayers anyway. Sure, He likes to hear from us, but perhaps even more He likes to be with us. And longer prayers aren't more effective as if it was some formula, but sometimes longer prayers are needed.



I'm just glad that there is such a thing as a blog to vent my thoughts for those that care enough to read! As always, thanks for reading!